Anger as a Motivator
I learned how to use anger as a motivator.The problem with that strategy is that it can keep you stuck in anger. And when I'm angry, I tend to make comments that I should otherwise not make. Frustration tends to feed that anger.
Right now, I'm very, very frustrated--with so many things in my life. There was a time when I needed to be in a place that moved slow. Now, I'd like things to move faster--and they move as slow as they always did. It's not the fault of the place--it's that I've come back to life. Lacking knowledge feeds the anger. There are so many things I want to do--so many things I can contribute, but I don't know how to get the word out, don't know how to make the first step.
There are so many things I don't know and can't find the information on. Boredom feeds the frustration, too. I'm bored most of the time. There are no challenges here. I have to make challenges for myself, and that isn't always a good thing. I don't want to be here any more, but I can't figure out how to move things forward to get out of here.
Maybe I'm impatient. Maybe I don't quite understand how The World works, and I need to slow down because The World doesn't move as fast as I'd like it to. It's hard though, and hurtful. I panicked the other day because I thought I lost some personal documents--and when I woke up from that panic, I realized that I had forgotten where I'd put them. When I put them where they are, I was in the depths of a broken heart, and I didn't want to really look at some of my posessions. For me, a very broken heart means that even the smallest, most insignificant posession can bring back a flood of memories and upset me.
The broken heart hurt more than being excoriated for a bad argument--and, not knowing a good strategy for dealing with it, I just stayed in one spot, in one place, that would not give me the stimulus I needed, but would at least be a crucible I could curl up in and try to get better. A broken heart feels an awful lot like a long-term illness. Some lethargy, mind-confusion, some loss of vitality.
Life with a broken heart is an exercise of going thru the motions and not much more.So, maybe that's why I'm so angry a lot of the time, too--and where all the frustration comes from. I suffered a broken heart that felt like the pain all over again.
How do I slow down, amd not panic so much about all that pain-and-heartbreak induced lost time? How do I stop being frustrated and angry and sometimes lashing out when I should just chill?
Right now, I'm very, very frustrated--with so many things in my life. There was a time when I needed to be in a place that moved slow. Now, I'd like things to move faster--and they move as slow as they always did. It's not the fault of the place--it's that I've come back to life. Lacking knowledge feeds the anger. There are so many things I want to do--so many things I can contribute, but I don't know how to get the word out, don't know how to make the first step.
There are so many things I don't know and can't find the information on. Boredom feeds the frustration, too. I'm bored most of the time. There are no challenges here. I have to make challenges for myself, and that isn't always a good thing. I don't want to be here any more, but I can't figure out how to move things forward to get out of here.
Maybe I'm impatient. Maybe I don't quite understand how The World works, and I need to slow down because The World doesn't move as fast as I'd like it to. It's hard though, and hurtful. I panicked the other day because I thought I lost some personal documents--and when I woke up from that panic, I realized that I had forgotten where I'd put them. When I put them where they are, I was in the depths of a broken heart, and I didn't want to really look at some of my posessions. For me, a very broken heart means that even the smallest, most insignificant posession can bring back a flood of memories and upset me.
The broken heart hurt more than being excoriated for a bad argument--and, not knowing a good strategy for dealing with it, I just stayed in one spot, in one place, that would not give me the stimulus I needed, but would at least be a crucible I could curl up in and try to get better. A broken heart feels an awful lot like a long-term illness. Some lethargy, mind-confusion, some loss of vitality.
Life with a broken heart is an exercise of going thru the motions and not much more.So, maybe that's why I'm so angry a lot of the time, too--and where all the frustration comes from. I suffered a broken heart that felt like the pain all over again.
How do I slow down, amd not panic so much about all that pain-and-heartbreak induced lost time? How do I stop being frustrated and angry and sometimes lashing out when I should just chill?
posted by Inner-Me @ 9:40 PM
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